As I prepared for the start of our journey on Sunday, I got to thinking about a great show I enjoy called Digital Nomad Family Podcast hosted by my traveling family mom pal Marissa. (FamilyofDashes on Instagram, if you want to check out their adventures!) They’ve done a bit more travel than we have and to many more countries, so they’ve worked out a system to get themselves and their four children up and out. The one thing Marissa often says in her pod is to figure out what works for your family. We’re still working to discover that, and I think I need to more consciously get the kids involved in making decisions about packing and travel.

The day or two before we had to leave El Cardo, I packed up our suitcases more or less the way they had been when we left the States. We’d received Christmas gifts, and we also have an encomienda of alfajores, bollos, and bizcochos, to take to Tío Luis (Jhan’s cousin), as well as a few gifts I picked up for family in Ohio. So to free up extra space, despite removing things that we had intentionally planned to leave in Perú (a portable easel, art supplies, and a Berkley water filter), I also had to make the call on what else to leave. Jhan had left some shorts and sneakers, so I decided to leave the beautiful summer hats I was gifted at Christmas, the kids’ towel ponchos, and some of my shoes that I don’t wear often on the farm. As far as the kids, I pretty much packed up all of their clothes, because by the time we get back to Perú in November (fingers crossed), they will have outgrown them.

I tried very hard to make sure all of the kids’ things were in our backpacks and suitcases: Josie’s lliclla, the charging cables, the phones, the laptops, the tablet, etc. I thought I had double checked their rooms carefully at Mamá Irma’s and Papá Miguel’s house.

…but we got to Arequipa and realized we had left Dylan’s lovey - a plush “penguin” pillow. There were some tears, but he was brave and thought about how, “penguin pillow will be safe at Mamá Mima’s house,” and how, “if they come to visit us in a couple of months with Tía Dayana, they can bring penguin pillow.” Big brother Khalil also gave him some Ibérica chocolate, and chocolate always helps.

As parents we have a choice when this sort of thing happens. It can be easy to feel frustrated or even to blame the kid for not remembering to put their most treasured lovey in their backpack. But in reality, I need to take the time to have a little family meeting about packing. Dylan is old enough to create a checklist with me of his belongings, and that would provide him with a physical list to run through to avoid forgetting items that matter to him. When you get out of bed at 5am to start a 3.5 hour car ride to Arequipa to a flight to Lima to Miami to Washington DC to Akron/Canton and you’re only 8 years old…you need your mom’s help remembering, you need help learning how to make systems that help you to be responsible for your own belongings. And I need to remember to slow down and take that time with each of my kids, so they can learn personal responsibility and feel empowered with knowledge that fits their ages.

So this is me reminding myself and you:

Slow down. Take a beat. What are you rushing that may be causing issues you’re experiencing with your kids? What can you do to educate, understand, and encourage your kids to avoid the kind of hiccup we ran into this trip?

Digital Nomad Family Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/digital-nomad-family-podcast/id1625022527